It’s rarely easy to talk about where we fall short as people. But sometimes, our brokenness can become someone else’s breakthrough.

Even though our stories often hold the power to inspire others and offer healing to ourselves, admitting our flaws can feel like holding a knife to your own heart.

 

But still, Central Cheetahs player Andisa Ntsila speaks about his fatherhood journey with honesty and heart.

 

The 31-year-old father of three had his first child at a young age, and because of that, he couldn’t quite step up as a dad. The truth is, he was also still trying to figure life out—juggling school and a budding career in a world that didn’t slow down for him.

 

It was in those uncomfortable moments that he lost out on his first fatherhood experiences. But Andisa doesn’t run from this truth; instead, he embraces it. He’s doing the work, gently making amends and showing up with a full heart—righting the past while building something meaningful in the present.

 

The celebrated athlete, born in Komani (Queenstown), has come to celebrate being a father, calling it one of the most important roles ever bestowed on him.

“Being a father has forced me to grow into a better man. It’s not perfect, but it’s purposeful. It (being a father) might not be the full scope of the purpose you were put on earth to do, but you can never deny the sense of purpose it gives you. You love bigger, you forgive even better. Everything has newfound meaning,” he said, beaming with joy.

 

“With my firstborn son, I was a child myself, so I didn’t know what I was doing or what that meant. I was in varsity at the time, so I didn’t experience much of it,” he shares.

“At that time, I was more worried about how I derailed the mom. Not fully saying it was entirely my fault, but I couldn’t stop thinking, ‘How stupid can I be—knowing that you can’t, but still did it?’” he adds, citing a lot of guilt.

 

But over the years, through deep introspection and effort, Andisa has had to work on forgiving himself.

 

 

“I was not alone in this journey. I had my older brother, whom I spoke to a lot—even though he didn’t have a kid of his own,” he says, giggling. “My dad also gave a lot of words of encouragement that helped.”

 

“Our relationship is growing, and I believe it will be a healthy one. It is not where I want it to be, but I see it going in that direction,” he says, describing his eldest son as full of jokes, full of life—smart, loving and someone he is proud to be the father of.

 

“I am dedicated to making a man out of him. I want him to feel my presence and know that I love him through my actions and words.”

 

He further describes his second-born son, now 3-years-old, as full of energy—loving, independent and always willing to share.

 

“Getting to do this again with him and my daughter is a blessing, although at times scary. I get to do it right this time, knowing that I can’t make the same mistake twice. I know that I can’t miss certain milestones again. I pride myself on stepping up for all 3 of my kids,” he says.

 

Andisa was raised by both his parents. While they played different yet crucial roles in his upbringing—with his mom championing discipline—it was his father who became his anchor.

 

 

“My mother laid a very important foundation of those day-to-day groomings—like cleaning after yourself, making your own food, being respectful, etc. And the older I got, the more I leaned towards my father. Not because he is perfect, nor am I trying to be him, but having him as my sounding board helped me understand the world through a man’s perspective.”

His dad’s encouragement to make peace with his past was what he needed most in order to move forward.

And being a present father was the one that stood out the most, the hardest truth for Andisa that fuelled his desire to be better for all his children.

 

“It is my father’s wisdom and patience that inspired me to be a father myself,” he says. “My dad was present—always. And I aspire to be that. A present dad.”

 

“I want my presence to fuel their confidence in knowing that they have that unwavering support. I want my kids to know a father’s discipline and safety and to know my love and guidance. I want to give them the framework to survive and prosper, to be great human beings and achieve all that God has in store for them.”

When asked what his favourite part of fatherhood is, he doesn’t hesitate:
“Getting to witness those important milestones—seeing your child move from not being able to walk to taking those first steps, to speaking, and becoming their own person—is truly unmatched.”

“Being a father is also realising that your life is not only about you now, but that it will echo for years to come through your children, even when you are not there. And that is the legacy I am building.”