Growing up in the townships—where there are no high walls or guarantees of privacy—parenting often extends beyond your own home. Every elder becomes a mom, dad, older sister, or brother. The 90s and early 2000s were the epitome of a time when it truly took a village to raise a child.

Actor and musician Tshepo “Howza” Mosese grew up during that era of communal parenting. But beyond the collective, it was his own father who ignited in him a deep love for family and fatherhood—one that continues to guide him today.

 

Mosese, now a proud father of two daughters with his long-time wife Salamina Mosese, describes fatherhood as his greatest role to date.

 

 

“Father not only taught me what not to do, but I also learnt from his mistakes. I’m not in a position to judge; I’m in a position to learn—accepting that he was the teacher and I was the student. And I’ve chosen to learn from both the good and the bad from this man God placed in my life to take care of me,” he reflects.

 

With a career spanning over two decades, Howza recently joined the cast of Skeem Saam as Ghost. His career journey, he says, was inspired by politically and socially conscious Black artists like Sankomota, Tshepo Tshola, and Brenda Fassie—artists who helped awaken his creative voice.

 

Still, no matter the spotlight or screen time, home is where his heart beats loudest.

 

“I’m a husband and father, first and foremost. That meant learning to prioritise what really matters. I’ve always been one of those pure monogamists—call it boring if you want—but I’ve always wanted to be a family man,” he laughs. “What inspired that, I suppose, was my upbringing.”

 

“I was raised by both a mother and father, and although their relationship had its ups and downs, they stuck together. It worked—it gave us structure, support, and a sense of belonging. I fell in love with that idea. I thought: how beautiful would it be to partner with someone and co-write this story of life together?”

 

And while bringing children into the world is just one part of it—what he calls “an act of extending myself into the world”—being present and involved is what truly matters to him.

 

“Jo, I love being a dad,” he says, beaming with pride. He stresses how much he holds fatherhood in high regard. “If you asked me whether I’d rather be at work or at home with the kids, I’d choose the latter any day.”

 

“Children are the best teachers,” he adds. “They’re a mirror that reflects you and teaches you about yourself. Just experiencing that keeps me recharged and helps me become a better version of myself—not just for them, but for everyone I encounter.”

 

Mosese acknowledges that marriage and parenting come with their challenges, but he chose this life with intention—and he embraces it wholeheartedly.

 

His admiration for his wife Salamina comes up often. He credits her with helping him grow in ways she may not even realise.

 

“Raising our kids with her by my side makes everything easier,” he says. “She’s my balance.”

On the subject of parental responsibility, he reflects thoughtfully, “There are different reasons why some mothers or fathers aren’t present. I don’t judge—circumstances vary. But I do think that when two adults decide to bring a child into the world—planned or not—once that child arrives, it becomes essential for both individuals to decenter themselves and realise there’s a bigger responsibility at hand.”

 

He continues, “The relationship between the parents—whether romantic or cordial—becomes the fertile soil where a child’s growth happens.”

 

Laughing, Mosese admits that he’s the soft parent in the household. “My wife brings the balance—she’s the semi-strict one,” he says with a grin.

 

Raised by schoolteachers, Howza grew up in a disciplined, no-nonsense environment. “Strictness and military-style parenting were the norm. And as the stubborn one, I caught the brunt of it. Even back then, I felt it was too harsh.”

It’s why he vowed to take a different approach with his own children—one grounded in gentleness, reflection and emotional presence.

 

“I believe in communication—not just to resolve issues, but to learn about your children and understand how to speak to them at different stages of their lives,” says Mosese.

 

He’s quick to point out that he’s not perfect, but sees beauty in the effort. For him, it’s about being a willing, present father. That, he believes, is the foundation.

 

With two daughters who adore him, he acknowledges that while he loves them equally, they require love differently because they are such distinct personalities.

 

“My firstborn, Tumelo, is like an angel. She’s sweet, empathetic, and super laid-back,” he shares. “And while my secondborn, Thato, is also an empath and passionate about people, she knows how to say no. She’s a firecracker.”

 

He adds with a smile, “That’s something Sally and I both struggled with growing up. As empaths, we had a hard time setting boundaries and saying no. So we’ve had to learn, along the way, how to support that kind of strength in her.”

 

“Seeing that contrast play out in our kids is fascinating,” he says, laughing. “Tumi reflects where we were years ago, and Thato is where we are now.”

 

Mosese adds that the greatest gift he received from marriage is being a father, “and I’ll forever be grateful to God for it.

 

“As men, we have a lot of work to do. We’ve been scarred from our history that has in turn influenced us to be who we are today. But we have to be conscious of the history and how we can alter the impact to become better men for everyone else including our children,” he said.